burying the hatchet (or not) and living with it
walking at the park unmidful of the cold winter night, i caught myself shedding dry tears after watching "the hours" at the film museum. the tears came as a surprise because it was not the first time i watched it. only this time i guess i was more moved by the intensity of the film's message given my present circumstances. i felt sadness.
no, i am not thinking about committing suicide. silly.
rather, as i said, i am more inclined towards the sublime message of the film. to me it was about the choices we are left with. like to choose life sometimes means death. and to choose death is to give life to others. so what do you take?
this thought about 'making choices' came to me as i read an email from a friend a few minutes ago. she was asking for advise whether to give up her marriage or not. having not been married nor in any relevant relationships to draw experience from, it was difficult for me to give her something substantial. i thought it over for a few moments and eventually came up with something for her: to stay means to endure the pain of living with someone you can't live with; leaving means starting life anew.
or is it?
who knows? i always believed that we will never know the consequences of our decisions. the impacts only unfold to us after making that big step, if we ever do it at all. either way, whether we make decisions or not, we still live with the consequences, similar to the dilemma in 'the hours'.
the most i can offer my friend are my ears and shoulders and to support her future decision. i encouraged her to think it over many times, to talk to other friends and to people who may give sound advice.
my friend plans to bury the hatchet soon. my only wish is that she buries it not on her husband. that would be macabre.
**********************
big day tomorrow for this kid. another presentation for that future job i was talking about. wish me luck or not, it's your choice.
*i snapped a pic of this cute random guy i saw in the train station a few months's ago. not that it means anything with today's entry. just my choice to post it. ang kulit ko no?
listening to dido's white flag
this is marc's version of the truth, sometime at 10:01 PM
if you can't live with it, he can.
6 Comments
Good luck today! Taking decisions is difficult indeed. When and where exactly to draw the line? Should we only take into account the past or also promises and good intentions for the future?
thank you emmanuel for the sending me luck.
you're right, drawing the line is never easy. and crossing that line ain't either.
i'm so excited for you, dearie! hold your chin up high, you're making a lot of difference. humbling, isn't it? when good things come along your way. you're so blessed. always keep that in mind :)
What happened then? I have something to share to you. I hope I reach you today. (hugs) Maybe it will help you out. I think I am sure it will.
Hey marcky, Cute guy indeed! I suddenly recall the M incident. (He just might be visiting your blog, asa pa us, but you never know. I've actually lost touch.) Good luck to whatever you're praying for. Thinking of you a lot lately :) Wonderful video on Ate Le's art! Yes, her kitchen is magic.
alexie: oh M... yes M from puerto rico... the other day i saw our pic during the pride... cute talaga sya!
every all: thanks for sending me luck!
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